Friday, December 21, 2007

She did what to Santa?...


The News-Press reports that a "Connecticut woman wanted to get her hands on a particular holiday package.
Sandrama Lamy was charged with fourth-degree sexual assault and breach of peace for allegedly groping Santa Claus. The 33-year-old woman apparently has a thing for older men, but her X-rated wish is an automatic disqualification from Santa’s “nice” list.The world is no longer safe for shopping mall holiday characters. Just ask the Easter Bunny. He’s still reeling from the infamous Bunny Brawl of 2006 at the Edison Mall.Now, another case of shoppers gone wild. This time it was Kris Kringle getting a Christmas goose. Apparently, the jolly old soul’s little round belly did not shake with laughter like a bowlful of jelly. Laying a finger aside his nose was the signal to alert mall security: “There’s a ’ho ’ho ’ho in my lap!”Such mall mauling is unprecedented, according to “Santa Tim” Connaghan, president of RealSantas.com, who coaches hundreds of prospective red-suits a year. He told reporters it’s not unusual for grown-ups to ask to pose with St. Nick, but he’s never heard of anyone making the moves on the man.
“I’ve had some very nice ladies sit on my lap,” Connaghan said. Careful, Santa.“Once in a while they’ll say ‘I hope Mrs. Claus isn’t going to be upset.’ You have to be discreet and kind and say, ‘Oh no, she’ll be OK. You can sit here, but only for one photo.’ ”Apparently the Connecticut woman had a different kind of photo opp in mind — something more suitable for an adult magazine than the family Christmas card.Just wait till news of this reaches the North Pole. Mrs. Claus might very well pull a Faith Hill, publicly chastising another woman for manhandling her man. Can you say sexual harassment lawsuit?Easygoing Santa might be apt to let his fondling fan off easy, but his pushy wife could be another matter. The control freak is always pressuring him to eat more to keep up his image. “Nobody wants a skinny Santa,” she nags.Whether he sports six-pack abs or a little round belly, it seems that some women crushing on Kringle just can’t keep their paws off Claus."

18 comments:

bluedreamer27 said...

how stupid they are
they ruined the real meaning of christmas
it was silly to use santa for their selfish desire

Nezha said...

Hahahahaha, this post is utterly hilarious! Santa must be furious. The utter rudeness of the woman. The cheek.

Bilbo said...

Yep, it definitely gives new meaning to the term "Ho, Ho, Ho!"

waliz said...

hahaha...very funny..i never thought women can fall for santa...wht does she thinks she is?? weirdo....and a woman did tht? omg...

Storage Master (Phil Ceriale) said...

I see the mistletoe didn't work...

Phil

Unknown said...

What can I day Santa is "HOT", I'm in love with him myself.

Shelia said...

LOL, Dag, not even Santa is safe....what is this world coming to! Poor mall Santa, this is probably just a part-time job to buy his kids some gifts, HA!

Tawnya Shields said...

I never saw Santa as being a sex symbol. Perhaps she should get her freak on with a willing Santa through one of those "adult" escort companies.

I guess to each his own. She is certainly unique. The Easter Bunny better hide his eggs! :o)~

The All Seeing Eye said...

Well Bluedreamer27, at least she got her just deserts...

The All Seeing Eye said...

You're so right, Nezha. But she was in for a surprise when she got arrested for her actions...

The All Seeing Eye said...

Bilbo, I am glad the "ho, ho, ho" story left you going "ha, ha, ha"

The All Seeing Eye said...

You're right Waliz. I wonder if she had a couple of drinks before she did her thing...

The All Seeing Eye said...

My question Phil, is where did she think the mistletoe was hanging...

The All Seeing Eye said...

Yes, Debo Hobo. But you wouldn't be pulling on his "rudolph"?... Would you?...

The All Seeing Eye said...

I am glad that I brought you some good laughs, Shelia. It does give another meaning to the song "I saw mommy kissing Santa" though...

The All Seeing Eye said...

Well Titania, hopefully the Tooth Fairy is safe...

ZonaNet said...

every year in christmas I hope the peace to all world

yazin....libya

The All Seeing Eye said...

And Merry Christmas to you too, Zonanet!